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Showing posts with label Islamic. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Islamic. Show all posts
Thursday, 4 June 2015
Your Guide to a Good Jummah
Monday, 8 December 2014
10 Actions to Boost Self-Confidence
As Muslimahs, I think it's doubly important to have that extra bit of self-confidence what with the deen always being put down in the media and the local/wider community. I came across this post on: http://productivemuslim.com/sisters-self-confidence/ which gives tips on how to be more positive as well as boosting your confidence.
Enjoy!
10 Actions for Sisters to Boost Self-Confidence
One of the major barriers to
productivity I often hear about when I meet sisters across the world, is
the lack of self-confidence. I know from personal experience that is
isn’t easy to develop confidence – some people are born with it, but I
believe for most of us, it has to be developed and nurtured as we grow! I
often have friends and family tell me I carry an aura of confidence
about me; some wonder ‘what’s her secret?’ – it has has certainly taken
some training! It is really disheartening to see Muslim women who are so
talented, educated and ambitious thwart their progress and productivity
because they have low self-esteem. I’d like to explore how we sisters
can boost our own confidence with practical tips from the Qur’an and
Sunnah.
Firstly, I want to remind you that Allah 
has honoured women, affording us rights more than 1400 years ago and
endowing on us the opportunity to earn the highest stations in Paradise,
through the various roles we play as daughters, wives, mothers and
Muslimahs in our society. We only have to look to our historical
examples of female scholars such as Aisha bint Abu Bakr 
to learn that achieving confidence is not a sign of arrogance or being
against Islamic values. In fact, one can be confident in their faith
whilst being a Muslimah in pursuit of her goals.
has honoured women, affording us rights more than 1400 years ago and
endowing on us the opportunity to earn the highest stations in Paradise,
through the various roles we play as daughters, wives, mothers and
Muslimahs in our society. We only have to look to our historical
examples of female scholars such as Aisha bint Abu Bakr
to learn that achieving confidence is not a sign of arrogance or being
against Islamic values. In fact, one can be confident in their faith
whilst being a Muslimah in pursuit of her goals.
Remember, Allah
says: “And We have certainly honored the children of Adam and carried
them on the land and sea and provided for them of the good things and
preferred them over much of what We have created, with [definite]
preference.” [Qur’an: Chapter 17, Verse 70]
says: “And We have certainly honored the children of Adam and carried
them on the land and sea and provided for them of the good things and
preferred them over much of what We have created, with [definite]
preference.” [Qur’an: Chapter 17, Verse 70]
Let’s look at some of the ways I have learnt to personally conquer my fear and boost my confidence:
1. Have self-belief
As a Muslimah, if you don’t believe that
you can achieve something, even if it’s a small task, this can impact
your confidence greatly. The first step is to develop a positive mindset
and have the belief that you are capable of doing what you set out to
accomplish with Allah ‘s Help. This will take some internal work and will not be done overnight, but start by telling yourself that Allah
wanted you to be the best Muslimah you can be in every aspect of your
life – this will get you on the road to developing confidence.
‘s Help. This will take some internal work and will not be done overnight, but start by telling yourself that Allah
wanted you to be the best Muslimah you can be in every aspect of your
life – this will get you on the road to developing confidence.2. Use positive language
What kind of language do you use in your
daily life, whether at work, home or in the community? Do you tend to
use the words ‘can’t’, or ‘don’t believe’ or ‘not sure’ often in your
responses? If you do, then perhaps you are using what psychologists call
‘self-limiting’ terms which can prevent you from being confident.
Instead, try to say ‘I can do this’, ‘I will inshaAllah achieve’, or ‘I
am capable of..’ as this kind of language will increase your positivity and give you a sense of self-belief.
3. Dump your negative thoughts
When negative thoughts and whispers
enter your mind then remind yourself of the positive language. Don’t
allow yourself to be put down by these thoughts, as this will prevent
you from achieving your set goals. Try writing down negative feelings
and thoughts, then tell yourself the opposite
of what have you have written. For example, if you have written: ‘I
can’t do this because I’m not good enough’, tell yourself ‘I will try to
do this and I might actually be good at it’. If you let negative
thinking sabotage your productivity, then you may feel regret later in
life.
4. Write down a list of your strengths
One of the most powerful exercises I
have done with my mentor on a regular basis, is to discuss and write my
own strengths. As an example, I have written that I have ‘good
interpersonal and communication skills’ and then written an example of
when I proved this such as at an event when I met with someone new. This
short exercise should take no more than 20-30 minutes but will serve as
a great way to increase your confidence, especially when you are
feeling down. Use this list of strengths to motivate you in whatever
area of work you are focussing on.
5. Read up about confidence
Confidence is not something we are all
born with, but it is certainly a quality we admire in people around us.
Some are gifted with it, while others have a ‘quiet confidence’ about
them which we may not always perceive. There are some great resources
out there to help you with confidence; one of my favourites is ‘How to
Develop Self-Confidence & Influence People by Public Speaking’ by
Dale Carnegie. You can also search online for the many other tools and
articles on why self-confidence is important especially in women, in
both professional and personal capacities. Read up on the female
scholars and pious women, and take lessons from their personalities and
ways they handled their affairs – they are the best of examples.
6. Receive compliments gracefully
When I look back to my days of low
self-confidence, I re-call compliments being vital to giving me a boost –
especially when they were from people I respected, like my teachers.
Some sisters on the other hand find it extremely difficult to receive
compliments, and sometimes ‘defer’ them, so they put themselves down,
instead of graciously thanking someone for their kind words. Although
this should be carefully balanced with avoiding feelings of pride or
complacency, accepting compliments when you’ve earned them can remind
you that you have good qualities and traits to contribute. Respond to
these compliments by saying ‘thank you, that’s very kind of you’ while
acknowledging that you always have more to learn, to keep your humility.
7. Pursue something you are good at
There’s nothing more empowering than
discovering you are good at something. Once you know what you are good
at, you can gain a sense of self-fulfilment and maximise your
confidence. For many sisters I meet, there are so many dreams and ideas
they have, yet the environment or family expectations mean they are
unable to pursue such activities. My advice is to keep trying until you
are able to do this, it will in turn have positive psychological
benefits for you and your family when you do what you love.
8. Network with new Muslimahs
Meeting new sisters is always a test of
our own confidence as it can take us out of our comfort zone, but it is
also a great way to improve your self-confidence by telling people about
yourself. Before you go to an event, meeting or somewhere where you can
network with people, think about the interesting things you like or
have done to use as talking points. Hopefully it will ensure that the
people you talk to have a interesting conversation with you and remember
you as a confident Muslimah!
9. Be independent
Being able to do things without
depending on others is a huge morale booster as it gives you a sense of
empowerment and self-dignity. This may be doing something you haven’t
ever done on your own before, like learning a new skill or practising a new hobby.
For years I failed at driving many times before I passed! The ability
to accomplish something completely independently will give you a real
confidence boost.
10. Make this special dua
There is a beautiful du’a which encapsulates the need to always ask Allah
to help us improve ourselves in our faith and character. It is no easy
task, and this du’a will give you the strength to be confident and
productive Muslimahs!
to help us improve ourselves in our faith and character. It is no easy
task, and this du’a will give you the strength to be confident and
productive Muslimahs!
(Moses) said: My Lord! Expand for me by
breast (with assurance). And ease for me my task. And untie the knot
from my tongue. That they may understand my speech.’ [Qur’an: Chapter 20, Verses 25-28]
Sunday, 21 September 2014
Umrah tips part 2: Performing Umrah & Shopping/travelling
Try to perform Umrah after Isha. I found this to be the 'least busiest' time. Others say after or before fajr.
Do tawaf upstairs as it is less packed. We did tawaf in the normal place once before fajr, it was packed. The men don't care they are pushing women less than half their size and we nearly got crushed. Yes. By men. Astaghfirallah. Some people have no manners even when right in front of Allah's house. I'm pretty sure a 6 foot 5, 10 tonne Arab man tried tripping me up from behind so he could push in and touch the black stone. Even in April, before Fajr we were not able to touch hajr aswad. That's how packed it was. I can not even imagine Hajj or Umrah during Ramadan.
Khaleejis (sorry, really trying not to generalise but it is mainly the gulf Arabs) do not comprehend the notion of queuing or waiting patiently for their turn. You will find this out when exchanging money, queuing at bin Dawood or queuing up for food. They ignore you or simply push or elbow you out the way without a care.
NOT ALL WATER IS ZAMZAM - look at the signs. Some say drinking water some say zamzam. The water tankers inside the Masjid al haram say zamzam so I would fill my bottles from there.
Madina has zamzam too! I never knew this, I thought you could only get zamzam from Makkah and was sad that we never got big bottles to bring back before going to Madinah, but Alhamdulillah Masjid Nabi has zamzam water tanks inside YAY! You can also purchase 10litre zamzam bottles (packed in cardboard boxes) to bring back home. Make sure you write your name on all sides of the box when returning home as people may just take yours at the airport.
Wash your fruit with bottled water and make tea/hot drinks with bottled water.
Fill up on the hotels breakfast buffet. If you can, take a roll with cheese and salad and a yogurt to have for lunch as you may not feel up to walking about looking for a place to eat especially if you're fussy like me and don't want junk food broast chicken (which is everywhere!) or curry.
Shopping in Makkah & Madinah.
Bin Dawood is the main supermarket there. In Makkah there is one under the clock tower buildings and another branch to the right of the clock building, I think it's part of the Hilton shopping complex just after kfc. Let me know if I'm wrong. Bin Dawood sells everything from shampoo, juice, ice cream, chocolate dates, cheese, lassi, tea bags pots and pans, and fresh fruit. Defo go there for ice ream to cool yourself down after dhuhr or asr. And to stock up on fresh fruit and juices. I recommend fresh mango.
We stayed in the clock building - Movenpick hotel, hajar towers so alhamdulillah it was easy finding our way back compared to if we stayed in a hotel elsewhere. Mainly because my sense of direction is not one of my strong points. There are shops selling kids clothes, prayer mats, stands with ice cream and much more in the tower.
If you see something you like in Makkah, purchase it!. Everyone says Madina is cheaper-yes mostly true. But sometimes the quality is not as good. For example my sister purchased a beautiful prayer mat that comes with a matching bag for 35 rials (don't pay anymore than this price though, I'm sure other shops sell them for 30) it was really good quality. I got mine from Madinah for 20 rials but mine is thinner and of less quality.
Buy abayas from Madinah. They were selling farashas in different colours for 50 riyal. I got a really nice button abaya with gold diamantes for 110 rial.
Make use of Madinah market stalls for gifts - hijabs, tasbihs, Qur'an, perfumes, jewelry, kids clothing and sometimes abayas/jalabiyyas for under 20 rials! Yes under £4. Obviously they are factory rejects or may be slightly old in design or have a few threads sticking out or are an inch shorter than you'd like but they are an absolute bargain!! Enjoy the stall holders shouting prices in Urdu - DAS RIAL lol
The main shopping centre in Madina is the Taiba centre. Visit malik al oud for incense accessories. Alhamdulillah the Burmese worker is really fair and honest in his prices.
Travel by SAPTCO between Makkah, Madinah and Jeddah ( doesnt matter if its to and from Makkah and Jeddah as this is only 1.5 hours max) get tickets to a VIP SAPTCO bus if you can. They serve you a small meal and tea/coffee. It's nonstop and has a toilet. Maximum 30 people allowed and quite spacious. Costs about 90 rial or £15/person. Taxi drivers will charge you much more than this and some are known to be crazy or pervy so save yourself the hassle and use SAPTCO.
That's all I can think of. InshaAllah this is of help to anyone traveling to Saudi. If you have anymore tips or questions please leave a comment!
Do tawaf upstairs as it is less packed. We did tawaf in the normal place once before fajr, it was packed. The men don't care they are pushing women less than half their size and we nearly got crushed. Yes. By men. Astaghfirallah. Some people have no manners even when right in front of Allah's house. I'm pretty sure a 6 foot 5, 10 tonne Arab man tried tripping me up from behind so he could push in and touch the black stone. Even in April, before Fajr we were not able to touch hajr aswad. That's how packed it was. I can not even imagine Hajj or Umrah during Ramadan.
Khaleejis (sorry, really trying not to generalise but it is mainly the gulf Arabs) do not comprehend the notion of queuing or waiting patiently for their turn. You will find this out when exchanging money, queuing at bin Dawood or queuing up for food. They ignore you or simply push or elbow you out the way without a care.
NOT ALL WATER IS ZAMZAM - look at the signs. Some say drinking water some say zamzam. The water tankers inside the Masjid al haram say zamzam so I would fill my bottles from there.
Madina has zamzam too! I never knew this, I thought you could only get zamzam from Makkah and was sad that we never got big bottles to bring back before going to Madinah, but Alhamdulillah Masjid Nabi has zamzam water tanks inside YAY! You can also purchase 10litre zamzam bottles (packed in cardboard boxes) to bring back home. Make sure you write your name on all sides of the box when returning home as people may just take yours at the airport.
Wash your fruit with bottled water and make tea/hot drinks with bottled water.
Fill up on the hotels breakfast buffet. If you can, take a roll with cheese and salad and a yogurt to have for lunch as you may not feel up to walking about looking for a place to eat especially if you're fussy like me and don't want junk food broast chicken (which is everywhere!) or curry.
 |
| Make sure to fill up on breakfast and perhaps take a roll with cheese&tomato and a yogurt back with you for lunch to keep you going. |
Shopping in Makkah & Madinah.
Bin Dawood is the main supermarket there. In Makkah there is one under the clock tower buildings and another branch to the right of the clock building, I think it's part of the Hilton shopping complex just after kfc. Let me know if I'm wrong. Bin Dawood sells everything from shampoo, juice, ice cream, chocolate dates, cheese, lassi, tea bags pots and pans, and fresh fruit. Defo go there for ice ream to cool yourself down after dhuhr or asr. And to stock up on fresh fruit and juices. I recommend fresh mango.
We stayed in the clock building - Movenpick hotel, hajar towers so alhamdulillah it was easy finding our way back compared to if we stayed in a hotel elsewhere. Mainly because my sense of direction is not one of my strong points. There are shops selling kids clothes, prayer mats, stands with ice cream and much more in the tower.
If you see something you like in Makkah, purchase it!. Everyone says Madina is cheaper-yes mostly true. But sometimes the quality is not as good. For example my sister purchased a beautiful prayer mat that comes with a matching bag for 35 rials (don't pay anymore than this price though, I'm sure other shops sell them for 30) it was really good quality. I got mine from Madinah for 20 rials but mine is thinner and of less quality.
 | |
| Prayer mat from Makkah - Clock Tower. Thick material |
 |
| Prayer mat from Madina - thin material |
Buy abayas from Madinah. They were selling farashas in different colours for 50 riyal. I got a really nice button abaya with gold diamantes for 110 rial.
 |
| Gold and black abaya from Madina Taiba Centre. |
Make use of Madinah market stalls for gifts - hijabs, tasbihs, Qur'an, perfumes, jewelry, kids clothing and sometimes abayas/jalabiyyas for under 20 rials! Yes under £4. Obviously they are factory rejects or may be slightly old in design or have a few threads sticking out or are an inch shorter than you'd like but they are an absolute bargain!! Enjoy the stall holders shouting prices in Urdu - DAS RIAL lol
 |
| Cheap gifts for friends and family such as 12 tasbih for 10 rials, 12 itr for 5 rial, and a pack for men with a cap, tasbih and itr for around 2 rial. |
 |
| You can buy gorgeous costume jewelry such as these rings for 5 rials each. The bangles/bracelets were from one of the many nearby shops. |
The main shopping centre in Madina is the Taiba centre. Visit malik al oud for incense accessories. Alhamdulillah the Burmese worker is really fair and honest in his prices.
Travel by SAPTCO between Makkah, Madinah and Jeddah ( doesnt matter if its to and from Makkah and Jeddah as this is only 1.5 hours max) get tickets to a VIP SAPTCO bus if you can. They serve you a small meal and tea/coffee. It's nonstop and has a toilet. Maximum 30 people allowed and quite spacious. Costs about 90 rial or £15/person. Taxi drivers will charge you much more than this and some are known to be crazy or pervy so save yourself the hassle and use SAPTCO.
 |
| Air conditioned VIP bus with comfortable seating. |
 |
| VIP bus breakfast meal from Makkah to Madina: Egg sub, water, fizzy drink. |
 |
| VIP bus lunch meal box from Madina to Jeddah: Rice, Chicken nuggets, salad, apple, orange juice |
That's all I can think of. InshaAllah this is of help to anyone traveling to Saudi. If you have anymore tips or questions please leave a comment!
Saturday, 13 September 2014
Umrah/Hajj Tips Part One: What To pack
Salaams all,
as the Hajj season is upon us I thought it would be useful to post my tips as I went for Umrah a few months ago. I did initially have a post typed up in draft but accidentally deleted it :( sooo, inshaAllah, time permitting, I will type something again with pictures :)
I have compiled a list of what to pack as a general guide if any of you are thinking of going soon or in the future.
3 pairs loose trousers i.e harem pants or linen trousers.
3 abayas including the one you will wear to the airport. The abayas don't have to be black, there are people from all over the world wearing their own modest versions of traditional clothing including long skirts, shalwar kameez, maxi dresses etc. A good idea I found was a really long tunic or loose dress, 3 quarter in length (in between ankle and knee length) with loose trousers underneath. Why? Abayas are usually long and the bottom gets dusty and dirty real quick. Saudi is a desert country so lots of sand and dust about; plus you will no doubt be going to get zamzam water and the floors will be wet. Not only that but another good reason not to wear an abaya that's TOO long is to save from tripping up or people stepping on it.
3-4 light material hijabs. Nothing too thick. Not those maxi hijabs you get everywhere unless you will be wearing it in the evening. Choose any colour or print you like. Doesn't have to be limited to black.
Canvas bag/over shoulder drawstring bag to carry your shoes in. Don't leave your shoes on one of the racks in masjid al haram or masjib nabi - you won't be able to find them! Keep them in a bag on you at all times and place to your side on the floor when praying. Everyone does this.
Prayer mat - you can either take one or buy from Makkah or Madina. You won't always get inside the masjids to pray and if you do it doesn't guarantee a carpeted space i.e. you will be praying on marble so a prayer mat will make it easier/more comfortable.
Snacks: take crisps, biscuits, sweets. I wouldn't recommend chocolate as it melts. Keep some snacks in your bag at all times even when flying to the airport, in Saudi as all the stories about Saudi airport workers/visa patrol are true. They are extremely S L O W and the queue won't move for at least an hour while they take their sweet time. Not only that but you may find yourself switching queues a few times and back. Organised they are not! The airport is not air conditioned so you may feel faint as my sister did, this is where snacks and some water will come in handy. Try to get some water from the plane - a bottle or small plastic pot.
2 pair flat comfy shoes/sandals with a good grip. Don't choose something with a completely flat sole as your feet will feel it with all the walking.
Sunglasses and sunscreen
Vaseline and mini first aid kit - plasters, sudocream, safety pins, bandage
Norethisterone - If that time of the month will fall around the time you go for Umrah or Hajj, see your GP for some medication to delay it.
Scissors and nail clippers - Ladies, you will need to cut a bit of your hair after performing sa'ee. We did this back at the hotel, there were many ladies who did it right after performing umrah but hair was on the floor which I didn't find hygienic.
Wipes - to clean your hands as well as shoes when they get dusty, and just for general quick cleaning on the go.
Toilet paper
Notebook to write down duas of those you are leaving behind as well as to keep a memoir of your time there.
Small travel spray bottle - fill with water (I filled mine with zamzam :D) keep in fridge and take out with you to spritz on face/hands/wrists to keep cool. If you can't manage to pack one, Bin Dawood sell some from 6 riyals.
Tasbih or u can buy it from there. Madinah has PELNTY. You can get a bundle for 10 riyals (under £1.50)
Take a couple empty water bottles to fill with zamzam. Your hotel may provide you with complimentary bottles of water - Movenpick did alhamdulillah.
Stay tuned for tips part 2!
as the Hajj season is upon us I thought it would be useful to post my tips as I went for Umrah a few months ago. I did initially have a post typed up in draft but accidentally deleted it :( sooo, inshaAllah, time permitting, I will type something again with pictures :)
I have compiled a list of what to pack as a general guide if any of you are thinking of going soon or in the future.
3 pairs loose trousers i.e harem pants or linen trousers.
3 abayas including the one you will wear to the airport. The abayas don't have to be black, there are people from all over the world wearing their own modest versions of traditional clothing including long skirts, shalwar kameez, maxi dresses etc. A good idea I found was a really long tunic or loose dress, 3 quarter in length (in between ankle and knee length) with loose trousers underneath. Why? Abayas are usually long and the bottom gets dusty and dirty real quick. Saudi is a desert country so lots of sand and dust about; plus you will no doubt be going to get zamzam water and the floors will be wet. Not only that but another good reason not to wear an abaya that's TOO long is to save from tripping up or people stepping on it.
3-4 light material hijabs. Nothing too thick. Not those maxi hijabs you get everywhere unless you will be wearing it in the evening. Choose any colour or print you like. Doesn't have to be limited to black.
Canvas bag/over shoulder drawstring bag to carry your shoes in. Don't leave your shoes on one of the racks in masjid al haram or masjib nabi - you won't be able to find them! Keep them in a bag on you at all times and place to your side on the floor when praying. Everyone does this.
Prayer mat - you can either take one or buy from Makkah or Madina. You won't always get inside the masjids to pray and if you do it doesn't guarantee a carpeted space i.e. you will be praying on marble so a prayer mat will make it easier/more comfortable.
Snacks: take crisps, biscuits, sweets. I wouldn't recommend chocolate as it melts. Keep some snacks in your bag at all times even when flying to the airport, in Saudi as all the stories about Saudi airport workers/visa patrol are true. They are extremely S L O W and the queue won't move for at least an hour while they take their sweet time. Not only that but you may find yourself switching queues a few times and back. Organised they are not! The airport is not air conditioned so you may feel faint as my sister did, this is where snacks and some water will come in handy. Try to get some water from the plane - a bottle or small plastic pot.
2 pair flat comfy shoes/sandals with a good grip. Don't choose something with a completely flat sole as your feet will feel it with all the walking.
Sunglasses and sunscreen
Vaseline and mini first aid kit - plasters, sudocream, safety pins, bandage
Norethisterone - If that time of the month will fall around the time you go for Umrah or Hajj, see your GP for some medication to delay it.
Scissors and nail clippers - Ladies, you will need to cut a bit of your hair after performing sa'ee. We did this back at the hotel, there were many ladies who did it right after performing umrah but hair was on the floor which I didn't find hygienic.
Wipes - to clean your hands as well as shoes when they get dusty, and just for general quick cleaning on the go.
Toilet paper
Notebook to write down duas of those you are leaving behind as well as to keep a memoir of your time there.
Small travel spray bottle - fill with water (I filled mine with zamzam :D) keep in fridge and take out with you to spritz on face/hands/wrists to keep cool. If you can't manage to pack one, Bin Dawood sell some from 6 riyals.
Tasbih or u can buy it from there. Madinah has PELNTY. You can get a bundle for 10 riyals (under £1.50)
Take a couple empty water bottles to fill with zamzam. Your hotel may provide you with complimentary bottles of water - Movenpick did alhamdulillah.
Stay tuned for tips part 2!
Monday, 30 June 2014
Do's and Dont's of Ramadan - Part 1
Ramadan: A month in which God multiplies our good deeds, forgives us and blesses us!
'O ye who believe! Fasting is prescribed to you as it was prescribed to those before you, that ye may (learn) self-restraint' [Quran 2:183]
This month is VERY precious for us Muslims; we cannot afford to waste a single minute.
Narrated Abu Huraira(r.a): The
Prophet said:"... whoever fasts during Ramadan out of sincere faith and
hoping to attain Allah's rewards, then all his past sins will be
forgiven." (Sahih Al-Bukhari).
"Fasting is a shield with which a servant protects himself from the Fire." [Ahmad, Saheeh]
Here
are a few Do's and Don'ts, of which some you may not know and some that
you may but shaytaan our ultimate enemy has made you forget!
|
Dont's of Ramadan |
Missing Prayers
Salah (prayers) are the second pillar of Islam. It comes before Saum (fasting).
It's OBLIGATORY on all Muslims and your saum is incomplete without Salah!
ACTION:
Pray 5 times a day understanding its importance and realizing that it is God you are standing in front of. This will not only help you with your abstaining from food but also from sins as the one who is busy remembering to keep his prayers doesn’t have time to commit sins! |
The Eye
Looking at a non-mehram (any person with whom marriage is allowed in Islam) is NOT allowed!
A
Muslim should lower his/her gaze at all times where possible this will
protect you from going towards that which displeases Allah.
AVOID:
* Eye contact with non-mahrams * Staring at the pictures in newspapers/magazines * TV - we stare at the TV without realizing the sinful images that are infront of us which we feel are normal.
These things affect your desires (even if its subconsciously) and entices you towards acting on these desires.
INSTEAD:
|
The Ear
Quit music or try refraining from it
INSTEAD: switch to
|
The Tongue
Back biting is considered a extremely sinful act
It
was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) that the
Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Do
you know what gheebah (backbiting) is?” They said, “Allah and His
Messenger know best.” He said, “Saying something about your brother that
he dislikes.” It was said, “What if what I say about my brother is
true?” He said, “If what you say is true then you have backbitten about
him, and if it is not true, then you have slandered him.” [Muslim]
It
was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) said:
The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Whoever
has wronged his brother with regard to his honour or anything else, let
him seek his forgiveness today, before there will be no dinar and no
dirham, and if he has any good deeds to his credit they will be taken
from him in a manner commensurate with the wrong he did, and if he has
no good deeds, then some of his counterpart’s bad deeds will be taken
and added to his burden.” [al-Bukhaari].
So if you think that talking on the phone or meeting friends might result in back biting then avoid it.
*Abusive language: When you abuse someone it doesn't harm him, it just adds to your sins!
God hates people who abuse, so don't use it even if you don't mean it!
Narrated on the authority of Jabir that he heard the (Holy Prophet) say: A Muslim is he from whose hand and tongue the Muslim's are safe.
*Be VERY careful how you use your tongue, hurting some one with your words, is DEEPER and STRONGER than physical pain!
INSTEAD:
|
 |
The Hand
Don't get into fights, stay away and if you get into one and lose your temper, practice patience (sabr) and walk away.
Narated By Abu Huraira : The
Prophet said, "Whoever does not give up forged speech and evil actions,
Allah is not in need of his leaving his food and drink ( i.e. Allah
will not accept his fasting.)" – [Sahih Bukhari, Vol.3, Book 31, #127]
People will probably think you're a coward, but God thinks you're a lion!
Source: email from http://www.alfitrah.com/
Thursday, 19 June 2014
Ingredients For a Content Life (2) - Love
Part 2 (final part): All you need is love..
The
definition of love is a ‘strong affection for something’. Love is an
innate feeling in every human being. It is sometimes thought of as the
element that makes us human .
The need for love
According
to Islam, love has to be enlightened. A sacred love is the love which
is realistic and insightful. It has been a common theme in moral advises
by great Muslim preachers and Sufi masters that one should not let
one's love for something or some person make him negligent of the whole
truth. The reason for this emphasis is that love naturally tends to make
the lover "blind and deaf'. If you love some one it is very unlikely to
have an impartial view of it, unless the love is directed by the
reason.
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Divine love
A
Divine love is that of a mutual love and thus the most fulfilling love a
creation could ever feel. Even the worst of people still can be a
receiver of Love from Allah so long as they repent. There are many
beautiful Hadeeth which relate this amazing and fulfilling love Allah
has bestowed upon His creation.
On
the authority of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him), who said
that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said:
"Allah the Almighty said: 'I am as My servant thinks I am. I am with him when he makes mention of Me. If he makes mention of Me to himself, I make mention of him to Myself; and if he makes mention of Me in an assembly, I make mention of him in an assembly better than it. And if he draws near to Me an arm's length, I draw near to him a fathom's length. And if he comes to Me walking, I go to him at speed." (related by al-Buhkari)
Furthermore
the amazing quality of divine love is that Allah has made it so that
through loving creation you can also be loving the Creator. This is done
through following the guide of how to love through the Quran, how we
live our lives, how we treat the earth and people around us. All of
these things can be counted as loving Allah because it is done in
obedience to Him and in seeking His pleasure and in turn Allah loves us
as shown in this Hadeeth;
On
the authority of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him), who said
that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him)
said:
"Allah (mighty and sublime be He) said; 'Whosoever shows enmity to someone devoted to Me, I shall be at war with him. My servant draws not near to Me with anything more loved by Me than the religious duties I have enjoined upon him, and My servant continues to draw near to Me with supererogatory works so that I shall love him. When I love him I am his hearing with which he hears, his seeing with which he sees, his hand with which he strikes and his foot with which he walks. Were he to ask [something] of Me, I would surely give it to him, and were he to ask Me for refuge, I would surely grant him it. I do not hesitate about anything as much as I hesitate about [seizing] the soul of My faithful servant: he hates death and I hate hurting him.'" It was related by al-Bukhari. |
Love of the dunya
According
to Islam, the minimum expectation from believers is that God should
have the first place in their heart, in the sense that no other love may
override one's love for God; God should be the highest and foremost
object of love. The Qur'an says:
Say:
If your father or your sons or your brethren or your wives or your
kinsfolk or the property you have acquired or the commerce you fear may
slacken or the dwellings which you love¬ if these are dearer to you than
God and His Apostle and striving in His way, then wait till God brings
about His command; God does not guide the transgressing people. (9:24)
This
verse clearly indicates that one's love for God has to be superior to
one's love for whatever else that one may come to love in one's life.
This superiority shows itself when the love for God and for His religion
comes into conflict with one's love for one's personal belongings. In
this case, a believer should be able to sacrifice his personal favourite
things for the sake of God.
However there is a balance as Allah says;
But seek, through that which Allah has given you, the home of the Hereafter; and [yet], do not forget your share of the world. And do good as Allah has done good to you. And desire not corruption in the land. Indeed, Allah does not like corrupters." (28:77)
We
should be moderate in when it comes to materialistic things and show
gratitude to the blessings we have. It is not wrong to enjoy or have
dunya in abundance but it can become a means against you when this dunya
distracts you from living your life according the deen and what is more
pleasing to Allah.
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Love of brotherhood
On
the necessity of love for people, we see that the Qur'an praises those
members of the Household of the Prophet who fasted three days and gave
everyday the only little food that they had at home successively to a
poor, an orphan, and a captive: "And
they give food out of love for Him to the poor and the orphan and the
captive. [They tell them:]we only feed you for God's sake: we desire
from you neither reward nor thanks."(76:8 & 9)
In another Hadeeth, The Prophet Sallahu Aleyhi wa Sallam said: "By
Him in Whose Hand my soul is, you will not enter Paradise unless you
believe, and you will not believe unless you love each other. Should I
direct you to something that if you constantly did it, you would love
each other? Spread the greetings of peace among you."[Muslim]
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Falling in love ..is it Haraam?
We
do not say love is halal or haram because it is a feeling. Maybe it is
not under control. You can judge what is under control.
If
we are speaking about the emotion which we call “love” then we are
simply speaking of a feeling. What we feel toward a particular person is
not of great importance until our feeling is expressed in a particular
action. Now if that action is permissible, then well and good. If it is
forbidden, then we have incurred something that Allah does not approve
of. If it is love between a man and a woman, the emotion itself is not
the subject of questioning on the Day of Judgment. If you feel you love
someone, then you cannot control your feeling. If that love prompts you
to try to see that person in secret and to give expression to your
feelings in actions permissible only within the bond of marriage then
what you are doing is forbidden.
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In conclusion
Love
is a natural need for a human and comes in many forms, a parent to a
child, friendship, romantically or through the bond of Islam. Having
love in ones life makes a key ingredient for a content life and the best
love is that of Allah’s so use the types of love we have talked about
to gain Allah's love if you want to be the most content.
''O Allah I ask You for Your Love and the love of those
whom You Love and the actions that will cause me to attain Your
Love,O Allah make Your love more beloved to me than myself,my
family and cold water''
Allahumma inni asaluka hubaka, Wa hubbaman ya hibuka,
Wal amal al-ladhi bil leghuni hubbaka,
Allahumma ja’al hubbaka a-habba alay-yai,Min nafsi,
wa-ahli,wa minal barrid.
(received in email from al Fitrah academy)
(received in email from al Fitrah academy)
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